This film took my virginity!

This experience was the first time I felt that I was truly acting in a real movie! Sure I had a role or two before, but they were nothing, no more than dry foreplay through thick clothes. This film took me through all the bases all the way home. Hmm, when I started typing I didn't intend to use sexual innuendos to describe how I feel, but if I'm to show you how passionately I feel about my experience then what other activity generates more passion?!

I was a bit apprehensive at the audition. I didn't know what I was doing, I mean doing there, at the audition. I was really surprised when Alex called me to come to the audition after weeks of silence. I was afraid of fumbling my lines, of sounding funny, of looking stupid (I'm too critical of myself). I was pleasantly surprised when he told me to just act natural, that was easy, so I bluffed through the audition. I'm lucky Alex had his heart set on a Russky character. I feel doubly lucky that he told me later than I'm in. I should probably thank his wife too, once I find out how much influence she had in that decision. :)

I waited for the script. There was none. I was getting worried. I needed time to study, to remember the lines (you know, age, senility, etc). I was told just to come to the first shoot and not worry about it. Easy for him to say that. Once we started shooting I finally realized that even if there was a script, I'm never to see it. I was told to be a certain character and it was up to me to bring him to life.

How does one create a character in several minutes?!

There was only one way I could think of, the character would have to become mostly me. I had only to pretend that I was still single and on a prowl for a companion. Fine, I took myself back to when I met my wife and started to remember how we interacted on our first several dates. That wasn't enough. My character was drooling for a much younger woman. I had to go back even further to my own personal experience of dating a girl who was 13 years younger than me (remember Alex's comments that this film has multiple parallels to actors' personal lives). The age gap doesn't diminish the lust, but it does slow the pace at which (lustful) advances are made. I had to show quite a bit of interest but at the same time keep the distance to give the girl the chance to evaluate if she really wanted the relationship with an older guy. In large age gap relationships the girl must be the one making the decision whether to go further or stop (my personal belief).

That time regression peaked in the bookstore scene. Several times during this (very long) scene I completely (unintentionally) tuned out everyone except Daisy and lost myself in my interaction with her. Those moments were as real to me as those years ago. After Alex called the end of the scene(s) it took me a few moments to come back to reality. The feeling was really surreal. Alex's ploy was brilliant. No amount of script memorization will make a scene as real as when the actor lives it. And what better way to get two characters to behave like they have just met and know nothing about each other than to withhold information so that the scene is based on reality. And I must say, Katherine was the main reason it was so easy for me. She is beautiful, her smile is infectious, and she just oozes warmth (hmm, I should have used those words as my come-on lines in our scene :). All of that came through even as Daisy. I can't wait to see what that whole scene looked like from camera's point of view (whatever is left of it after cutting room).

I must comment on the dinner scene with flying lasagna. The only reason I was able to stay in character (I hope I did) was because of Steve's acting. I took my cue from him. It wasn't Noah who was in charge of that scene, it was Wyatt. I have 4 kids and I know how to deal with rowdiness, so there I sat looking at Wyatt (this is in character) thinking "What are you waiting for? You are the Dad! Do something!" I actually almost said it but Daisy beat me to it, thank god. My saying that would have ruined the scene. I forcefully prevented myself from looking at Alex to get a hint as to how far do we let the scene go. Instead I focused on Steve, using him as a guide for my own character, while at the same time trying to interact with Daisy and mildly restraining Noah from phase 2 of his lasagna assault. I think my reaction came out authentic because of my oscillation between staying in character and thinking that maybe the scene should end. Again, until I see the scene in the film I won't know how it came out. Finally, I did remember in time that until the Director says CUT the scene must go on. That's another very valuable lesson to learn for an aspiring actor. Thank you Steve and thank you Alex.

I had several revelations. One of these was about acting. What I'm about to describe might be obvious to a trained and experienced actor, but for me it was like a light bulb going off. I now think that there are two most important words in acting: ACTION and CUT (though "You've got the role" and "You're fired" come close, even though they are sentences). The actor lives before ACTION and after CUT. The character comes alive in-between. Once sound of ACTION echoes down, the outside world ceases to exist and only the scene is real. For me, first couple of transitions into the scenes were slow. While early in the scene I still felt connected to the real world. That feeling dissipated as I got into the meat of the scene. Later the transition into the scene became really fast. I think the speed of this transition into the scene is important since the scenes can be really short. The coming out of scene for me was still slow, each time it took several seconds to disengage from the scene content. The longer and more involved the scene, the longer it took to switch back to reality. I guess that's normal as far as acting goes.

One other revelation was that I really am a very visual person. A little while back I took one of those silly psycho brain tests that also said that I'm a visual person. I don't know why that is since I'm a computer nerd by profession and to me "visual" implies artistic and artistic is in the half of the brain opposite of computer nerd. Nevertheless, it's true. Before the scene would start I could visualize the whole scene progression from start to finish, at least the way I would do it as a director. Perhaps my OCD was influencing that feeling. I had to force myself to stop doing that for two reasons. First, it was disruptive to the scene as I would tend to *think* about what's coming up instead of letting it happen naturally. Second, it was annoying the hell out of our real director. I must give credit to Alex's patience with me, I think he went above and beyond the limit. There can be only one! (Director that is :).

That "visual" part is becoming more prominent. For quite a while now I've had a complete script of a feature length movie in my head. I can visualize every scene of its whole two hour length. I play it in my mind during the two hours of commute every day, it makes the monotonous driving seem faster than the 80mph that I'm already doing. One day I'll actually force myself to write it down. I'll have to write it down as a script and not as a story. Seems backwards but feels the right way to do it. The annoying part is that another movie idea has formed in my mind but there is no room or time for it to develop until I free the space occupied by the first one. Any day now, real soon.

I've babbled too much about myself whereas this blog on this site is supposed to be for and about the movie itself. From what little I've experienced in my short scenes with the main actors, this movie is gonna rock! Steve is simply amazing and Katherine owns Daisy. I'll have to get used to working with the pros if I'm to continue with my acting.

I can't wait to see the movie as that is the only way I'll know what was in the script. :)